There is hope. I am making progress. It may be slower than I would like, but I think I am getting better, and that is always encouraging. Maybe you know what it is like to plan out a project, but for me it requires a whole shift in how my brain works. Projects don’t focus on the relationships or reasonings but on management of tasks. Everyone has their own specialities but I think I’ve always wanted to be a little bit of renaissance man.  

            I have also been doing a lot of thinking and reading on “social justice.” Kevin DeYoung, who wrote Just Do Something and Why We’re Not Emergent, has a blog and has written several times on the biblical foundations of social justice. His readings have challenged me to think more biblically and perhaps less emotionally. After I came into college I jumped on the Irresistible Revolution and Shane Claiborne-eque bandwagon. Now I am hopefully coming back to a view that is not more balanced, but more biblical. I would encourage anyone to read Kevin DeYoung’s blog [http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/kevindeyoung/], especially on the topic of “social justice.” You would be mistaken to read into this that I do not believe in helping the poor; rather, I want to learn to help others in a way that is Gospel-centered and motivated by the Scriptures.

Side note: If Indianapolis could be placed in southwestern Michigan it would be the greatest city in the world.

June 28, 2010

Internship Update #2 for ICND

Most of the time at my Near North internship is split between learning and planning. Going into the internship I thought I would be doing tasks constantly, but I have had to readjust to how much time I am allowed to simply learn more. Near North has been very gracious to give me some freedom.

            Recently, I am trying to learn more about how non-profits are funded. From the director, Michael Osborne’s, instruction, and from readings, I have learned about CDGB, HOME, and other grants. I am not intending to understand all of the particularities in managing a grant, but to rather understand the broad concepts of community development corporations and how they fund their projects. Seeing that the non-profit circle is quite diverse now, I have also found it necessary to understand more about LISC, INHP, HUD, and other federal and local entities that assist non-profits like Near North.

            Apart from this learning, I have continued to work on planning my two summer projects: Near North Day of Service and a community garden. We just got done revising the landscape plan for the day of service in conjunction with IndyParks, local residents, and the designers from Schmidt Associates. It has been great to learn to network and learn from professionals. My current task is to develop a work plan for the project. This plan will include a budget to work off of, needs of volunteers, and hopefully a way to connect the businesses and residents in the project. The project has little planned concerning networking with the community, but it is my number one goal: to connect local businesses with the community they work in. Hopefully, I will be able to find some creative ideas concerning this. Last week I attended a workshop with Big Car, a group that brings art into projects and communities. They want to partner, which is perfect seeing that I have no clue where to start to be creative.

            With the community garden, I have been contacting existing community gardens and people experienced with this type of work. As of right now, the garden will be run by the neighborhood association while using Near North’s land. I think it will be a mix of community space and individual plots, but the goal is to create a neighborhood gathering space.

       My personal challenge for the next several weeks is to find ways to create specific skills and create opportunities for my future while doing this internship. It seems that non-profit work is intensely individual work with vital meetings that create the work for more individual work.

I do actually enjoy it much of the time. The biggest downside is getting in a rut and feeling unproductive or just not being of much use. Because of that, today I made a to-do list that will hopefully keep on track all day. This may sound like a boring journal, but I think it is essential for me to learn to do the little stuff well, so that is worth mentioning.

I am still thinking a lot about how community development applies to my calling and the calling of any Christian. Yesterday I met with David Price from Englewood Christian Community Development Corporation. Their CDC is technically a separate legal entity from the church but in all reality, it is completely tied to the church. They formed the CDC because they wanted to provide housing and jobs for parishioners who needed them. The church is in the downtown area and many people have moved back to the church and live on the same street. It seems to be some sort of new monasticism I guess it would be called.

The idea of a CDC being run out of a church seems good, but I left the meeting with suspicious feelings. On just an observatory level, they did not seem to be running the organization well; actually, they admitted they had bad accounting and administrative functions. It is a relatively new CDC so that is part of it, and they did start the corporation based on skills they had but based on needs they wanted to meet.

The concept of meeting a need instead of using a skill is something that bothers me a little as well. I do not want to discount it too much because I think most of us do that, but it just didn’t seem to work as effectively. Finally, I am always concerned about a church straying from being centered on the teaching of scripture, and hopefully they still are. In all, I am not objected to the idea of a CDC, but I do not think it is the best solution for reaching out for many churches.

            Yesterday I also met about the design plan for the day of service. It was interesting to learn more about landscaping, but essentially I am the organizer and not the expert. The project seems to be going well, but I am definitely figuring out things as I go. Finally, I hope I am able to be a light shining in this workplace as several of the workers are not Christians. That is the reason I picked a non-Christian CDC, and I hope that I can learn from them and that God can work through me to impact them.

I road my bike to the Downtown Indy Library, hoping to finally read a little bit of John Perkins. This is the John Perkins who wrote With Justice for All, not the John Perkins who wrote Confessions of an Economic Hitman. One writes about the incarnate nature of Jesus Christ and living that out to develop communities while the other encourages readers to buy sustainable products, not purchase from corporations that use sweatshops, and local action as the key to community development. Same names, similar desire to improve communities, but one key difference: the gospel. This reminded me…

 —True development in communities must have its roots in the Gospel—

I have been taught this principle in school, read about it, heard it preached, but I think I am experiencing it in a more real way as I work for a community development organization that is doing a lot of good stuff but does not have the gospel at its core.

Anyways, I read through With Justice for All the way Keith Drury taught me to and got through the book in a little over an hour. Perkins’ main 3 points of which he is known for are: Reconciliation, Relocation and Redistribution. So as I try to figure out how I am called to community development, Perkins’ put challenging questions in my mind:

-What am I doing to seek reconciliation with those around me?

- Should relocating be a specific calling to a specific person…or is developing needy neighborhoods only possible by relocating to them?

- As a Christian, how does redistribution fit into a capitalist society?

Really, these questions are just the beginning of the thoughts that this book provoked. Questions that I do not have tidy answers too, but I think I need to ask. Part of me feels like I should not ask questions that could have scary answer. If I do not ask then, is it because the question does not deserve to be asked or because I am afraid to ask something that might make me change? If you can’t tell yet, God has been challenging me…

—It takes discipline to rely on God. Relying on God is difficult to do, but we should strive to it daily by learning to give up and rely on God’s grace—

Does that point above make sense? Whether or not it does, it seems like a paradox to me, and it has been a topic of lot of my conversations with God recently!

Learning theories must include personal experiences, so let me continue with the story of my day. I went from the library to downtown and ran up the War Memorial steps 10 times. The homeless people sitting there probably thought I was crazy! I was trying to pray when I was not totally focused on how exhausted I was. After I ran, I felt led to just sit with the homeless people. Then the Wednesday night homeless outreach came and handed out food and drinks. I wanted to talk but also did not want to force anything and I felt convinced that this time all I should do was listen and learn.

            I did say one thing to someone, “Hey”. Other guy, “hey”. Me, “How’s  the coffee?” Other guy, “really good”. Me, “Cool.”

After sitting there for over an hour, I rode my bike home, confused not so much at what God is teaching me but what I’m supposed to actually go do with it. So often I just want to know something I’m supposed to do so I can feel good knowing I’m doing!

Then I saw one of my neighbors walking near downtown. His name is Mark. He is 15. Last time I went into his house, the dog peed and they just put newspaper over it and left it. Mark squinted at me. (He lost his glasses the night before while fishing). He was wearing a sling and only had his shirt part way on. He told me about earlier in the day…He got hit by a car while riding his bike. It was a hit-and-run, and he broke his collar bone. Later that night when my girlfriend Melissa, her new roommate Hannah, and one of Hannah’s friends came over, Mark stopped and we gave him some ibuprofen. His family didn’t have enough money for the $13 subscription! It’s like God was telling me to pray and think about some things, but to not forget how simple it can be to show love to those around me.

The moral of the evening… For me, it is to pray more about what God wants me to be doing, and at the same time to not constantly be worried about doing but to first focus on relying on God.

I really appreciate all who read through all this (I know I rambled), and whether you have thought a lot about this or you do not even understand why I care about all this…I would really appreciate your feedback, especially on what you think about “community development.” Sorry the thoughts are scattered…

In His Grace,

Andrew

He has many great words of wisdom and stories. Here are a few of my favorites:

Wooden was married to his wife for 53 years when she died in 1985. After her death he wrote her a love note every month and set it on her side of the bed (which was always left made). Rick Reilly once asked him to write a book about making love last…

“I once asked him if we could write a book together about how to make love last. He agreed—until the day we were to start. I’d been waiting on his porch for half an hour when he finally opened the door, tears streaming down his face. “It’s too soon,” he wept. And Nell had been dead 15 years by then.”

Wise Words:

“Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.”

“A coach is someone who can give correction without causing resentment.”

“Talent is God-given. Be humble. Fame is man-given. Be grateful. Conceit is self-given. Be careful.”

“Be quick, but don’t hurry.”

“Consider the rights of others before your own feelings and the feelings of others before your own rights.”

coachwooden.com

Greatest coach ever in my opinion, and more because of his character than the mere fact he won 10 championships in 12 years.

What is it about water that brings so much peace and power all at the same instance? Going to Israel for a semester, I had a high expectation to encounter the Lord wherever I walked. Yet the only places that I could not walk on were the places that I was able to hear the whispers of God.  The times that I was the most still- sitting next to the Sea of Galilee on Yom Kippur, walking across the whole country in a few days, or looking over the Mediterranean Sea by where Jonah was- those were the times that I could feel the reality of God in a heart-warming way.

                Now that I am more than a half year removed from my semester in Israel, it is interesting what has stuck in my mind. The sights were amazing, my favorites being the Nile River and Pyramids in Egypt, Petra and Jerash in Jordan, and Jerusalem, the Sea of Galilee, Bethlehem, and many more in Israel. The teaching was incredible (still rivaled by several IWU profs) as I had a Rabbi, one of the top archaeologists in the world, and Dr. Paul Wright. Translation: the people that write the textbooks we read. Still, the relationships I built with other students and the pictures that remain in my head will be the most lasting memories I will take from Israel.

                In my mind’s eye I can still see me and 3 other stupid, stubborn guys determined to walk from the Mediterranean Sea to Jerusalem in less than 2 days. It was the quickest, longest walk of any Jerusalem University College (JUC) student ever, but we looked like we had walked through sewers when we got back (well, I guess we did). I can also still picture the Physical Settings of the Bible class looking out from Mt. Nebo at our last field trip, just like Moses did, not knowing what our future will hold, but counting it a blessing to just get a glimpse of God’s Promised Land. Sometimes I can even taste my favorite schwarma or gelato that I fell in love with, see the kids’ smiles in Bethlehem that I worked with, or hear the sounds of Jewish men and women praying at the Western Wall.

                An experience in Israel, like any study abroad, is hard to capture in only a few words, but perhaps one of my regular habits can capture my the land of the Bible the best. My favorite devotional routine was going to the room of the last supper from JUC, then passing by the Dome of the Rock and Western Wall on my way to the Garden of Gethsemane, before winding up the Via Dolorosa to the Church of the Holy Sepluchre where Jesus died, was buried, and rose. Just the mere knowledge of knowing that I walked the same path that Jesus did right before His death makes me shake. Yet it was never about where I was or what happened there, I am beginning to realize that it was all about recognizing my Savior as He pursued me.

For the Day of Service, I finished writing a grant this week, the IMAGINE Grant. This grant is through the G1N1 initiative with the 11 characteristics of a healthy neighborhood (Go here for the 11 principles, www.greatindyneighborhoods.org/principles.html). While it was difficult to know how to use my time efficiently on writing this grant, I loved the process once I knew what I was doing. Chris Barnett and Tonya both helped me edit the grant, and I felt like I did a solid job based on what I already knew. They helped me to format things in a more readable fashion, corrected inerrancies, and gave me “non-profit” type language. While writing grants might not sound appealing to many people, this all wet my appetite for grant writing and the opportunity to secure funds for something I believe in. Honestly, the Day of Service is great, but in the future, I would love to become talented at grant writing and use it for things that I believe can make even more of a difference.

Each day in the mornings, I also try to do some reading on cities and non-profits. I’m subscribed to two regularly updated, professionally-done blogs: Urbanophile (http://www.urbanophile.com/) and Blue Avocado (http://www.blueavocado.org/). I really enjoy Urbanophile as it has given me a deeper look into Midwest cities. Hopefully, I can gain a critical eye toward what is beneficial and what ultimately damages the residents of the city. While I am not quite sure what to be more skilled in, I am recently wishing that I had more hard skills in finance, economics, etc. I figure my leadership and theory-knowledge will develop as time goes on, but when it comes to class-work, it seems that hard skills would be most beneficial at this point. I’m actually a little frustrated looking back at the classes I have taken, but I trust that the Lord had a reason for giving a passion to take those classes at the time.  

I love Indianapolis too! Earlier this week I ran to Monument Circle and back. I ran up and down the steps of the Indiana War Memorial several times then stopped on top and looked out over that area of the city.

The architecture was beautiful, the birds were chirping, and the weather was perfect. My heart was most stirred by the people walking around and sitting on the steps of the memorial. Many were likely homeless and all are in need of Jesus Christ. It was an honor to pray for the city, and I look forward to more interactions I will have with my neighbors. Some of which have already started, but I will save that for later.

Grace and peace (like the HCers say),

Andrew

My overall feeling is a desire to learn more or even to know what to do to learn more. I don’t know where to start most of the time. I would be more than happy to immerse myself in something, but there is so much that I don’t know, that after 8 hours of learning about stuff in a day it is hard to comprehend much after 4 hours! I feel like I am studying for an exam in CDC work but I don’t know when the exam will be or what it will be on.

I’m helping to provide leadership for the Day of Service. I provide leg-work, coordination, and maybe a few ideas to the project. The idea is great: bringing together area businesses and residents to make the community a better place. I hope to involve community members more and more and as of right now I am trying to learn the code of communication as I contact different people in an effort to get some coordination flowing. I get 1 email back for about the 10 that I send. I hate being pesky, but this whole contacting people thing feels futile sometime. This is teaching me good discipline.

I am writing this at the end of an 8 hour day of sitting at desks, which is okay with me, but a little trying when I barely know I am doing. Despite the negative tone I think much of this has had, I look forward to this internship and I enjoy the people and the purposes of what they are doing. I just feel a need to have my own purpose and drive so I can implement some skills into what’s going on.

Ever wonder how we can be more disciplined in our walk with the Lord? Is a jolt necessary (like this week was going to be)? In my case, I decided….Nope!

My walk with the Lord is becoming more disciplined as I learn to consistently wait for Him to surprise me. So yea, I’m not doing the dead man walking thing and maybe I’ll say more about why later.

I’m still curious what everyone else does think about weeks or segments of time that are supposed to jolt us to rely on God more….